Trying to wrap my mind around a night like this is very hard. How is it possible to remember everything? Especially when there were so many intimate and personal moments that lasted only as long as the happening in real time. I’m still so very star struck from these events.

When we got there, Danny Lohner himself opened the for for us and greeted us in. He said, “Oh no, more dark people!!!” We laughed and shook his hand as he let us in. It went totally over my head that he has made remixes to songs that I really enjoy. We felt as if our hearts would be coming out of our throats.

I took only a few more steps before I ran into Rev John, a personal friend that I met since I first moved to Los Angeles. He owns Complex in Glendale. The house was decorated with candles all around. It had deep hues of red on the walls and various curio figures or creepy decorations. To my delight, the bathroom was dark and had some vintage utilities in it. There was a bar in the basement that was also candlelit and decorated with dark embellishments. I wish I had thought to get a photo.

We ran into Janine Gezang, who gave us a hug and asked us about ourselves. She promptly walked us over to Chris Corner to introduce us. My smile was going from ear to ear. I told him it was wonderful to meet him. It's amazing to meet someone you admire and have them be so incredibly humble and attentive to you. He was very curious and he asked us both personal questions, and remained open for us to ask him anything we liked. He also asked us where we were from, and the night flowed from there. Eye contact alone was a huge treat.

I had a few freakout moments, realizing I was at Renholdër’s house with none other than Gary Numan and his family, members of NIN and Skinny Puppy... and of course, all of IAMX. It took a little while to get over the massive internal freakout. How can you be yourself when you're just a normal person around all these people you admire? My hands were shaking, and I was holding cups of IAMX wine. Delicious! It was so good.

Throughout the night we had many chances to get our photos taken with band members. It was hard not to be giddy in such a special event. We had a lovely time, meeting people who flew in from all over the world to meet their idols. One lady was from Berlin and had gone to the very first dinner party in Europe. Her story was lovely.

When we all sat in the living room to listen to the album, some people started to cry. I was busy eating my dinner, but enjoyed the music all the same. At some point, we were all feeling the music so much that we got up and danced to about three songs. I got a video snippet of one of the songs, and I listen to it to take myself back to that special moment.

It was very tense to ask Gary Numan for his photo, but I love his music and I couldn’t fathom passing it up. He really tried to be courteous with us, but I could tell he preferred to be left his privacy. I still can’t believe I met him, though. He’s such a great influence on my life with his beautiful music.

I met a man that flew in from New York from the event, his name is Erik. We talked about Lustmord and underground music. He was nice enough to put me on the guest list for the Front 242 concert. It’s so crazy when you meet people that see the world the same way you do and share your same appreciation for music.

To wind down, we went back to the basement bar to say goodbye to everybody. I saw Chris Corner standing by himself, so I went up for some parting words and a few questions. I first asked which programs he uses. He did confirm he uses Ableton, but he also mentioned Logic. He did say he also likes to work with analog gear.

The second question was more personal. I asked him if he kept a diary and he told me he does writing of what happened during the day. I wish I'd have thought to ask them all more about themselves, but I am of the feeling that people deserve their privacy. That is not something for others to intrude upon.

When I said goodbye, I very timidly asked him for a hug. He hugged me twice, very obliging. I squealed on the inside. All the people that I met were very wonderful, and the house itself was lovely. Walking back down the steps felt like leaving a fantasy behind, the kind that fades away when you wake up and the dream is over. It was very special, I doubt anybody would understand the magic of the party unless they were there.

I am so grateful for this opportunity and so happy that I got to meet not one but two of my favorite musicians. Thank you for reading this and for your interest in sharing memories of a special night.

Even though we failed in keeping it together after this night, I'm glad that I got to make your dream come true. I wish we could have had a better dissolution. I'm sorry.

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