FORGIVENESS



Before you know it, we are already in April. The spring has sprung. Appropriately enough, with the coming of spring also came new beginnings.

The concept of forgiveness is one that I was not the best at during my developmental years. I’m a tough female, I don’t let anyone overstep my boundaries if I can help it. Sharp like the Queen of Swords I am, I stand up for myself rather sharply. It’s not always pretty. What changed that for me personally is trauma, but that’s not the case for everyone. Some people just have a change of heart because life makes them soften up. As time passes, people change. That much is clear.

The beautiful thing about forgiveness is when the people involved can let go of the resentment that poisons their hearts. You think the worst things and project them out toward the target, whether or not they deserve it. It turns into a grudge of whether or not they pop into your life and how you deal with the memory. It prompts some to disclose information they should not disclose about a person to their friends, for the sake of humiliating them or exposing them to the cruel judgments of others. And all that does is spread unjust poison. It is not at all an easy task to let go of resentment, especially after it has settled. But it’s not impossible.

When I find myself going into the maze, I seem to reconfigure my feelings. More often than not I seek forgiveness and retribution for my actions towards people. It works like clockwork; years after the fact I don’t mind to initiate the process. It brings me peace. The thought of releasing the tension and negativity in the heart is a liberating and lightening feeling. It lightens the spirit.

Forgiveness is something I contemplate now more than ever. After how things have transpired, I feel like it’s my duty to mature and to work to become a more gentle and compassionate individual. Perhaps emphasis is placed on this because of my career as a psychic helping others to overcome their obstacles.

Let’s ask the cards what they have to say about forgiveness:

PLAYING CARDS


Eight of Diamonds — Three of Spades — Three of Diamonds

All is well in the end when we start with the best of intentions.

Eight of Diamonds: Good luck, fortune and timing. Prosperity. Success in groups.

Three of Spades: Let go. Burial. Past that no longer serves. Loss. A burden being carried. Progressive work being done in teams.

Three of Diamonds: Things taking shape. String of events. Growth.

The takeaway from this spread is that no matter how bad something looks, there is a solution to it if both parties can get past the tangles. It’s a liberating feeling that helps the people involved to ascend.

TAROT


Two of Coins — Page of Swords — The Lovers


You've been at this a while already to know how it works. Cut through the bullshit. Say what you really mean. Be vulnerable with one another, there's a real connection there.

FALLEN ANGEL ORACLE


Bune — Zagan — Descarabia


24. Bune: Adventure. Eloquence and wisdom will bring success in a new venture. This card can hint at the death of something, signalling a passage from one stage to the next.

48. Zagan: Transformation. A fundamental change is not only needed but perfectly possible if you open your mind. Alchemy, changing one material into another.

52. Decarabia: Recuperation. A period of rest and calm reflection on your life, so you can decide what direction to take.

Despite there being endings, being well spoken and clear can bring peace and calm.

I think the cards were more or less in sync with one another here. Don't you agree?

THE STORY
For about two years now I have been in mourning of a friendship that up to 2014 had lasted for ten years. It brought with it a whirlwind of adventures and memories that I still cherish dearly. I think that the biggest thing about this friendship is that it was one that defined me as a person. That’s how deeply rooted it is for me. I had a lot of help come in times of stress or heartbreak, through college stumbles and romantic flops. Moments of joy were dutifully celebrated as well. I first met my sister thanks to my friend, who drove a couple of hours out to her and then took me to the Islands of Adventure to a scare fest in the Halloween Horror Nights. We wove in and out of haunted houses, spent the night with a college alumni and his creepy Russian room mate. At the end of it, I think we went shopping. She took me anywhere, and she had the same adventurer’s spirit I did.

The way we met is still endearing to me today. Back in 2006 I got tangled up with this guy I met in college, whose room mate she happened to be dating. She had messaged me from her boyfriend’s Myspace account and I had thought that was kind of weird, so I ignored her message. When I met her in person, though, I realized I had been too quick to pass unfair judgment. She asked me to accompany her to a psychic shop where she was going to get a reading. I told her that I also read tarot cards, and that I loved anything esoteric or metaphysical. The next day we cemented our friendship, we just hit it off. The rest is history.

Well, at some point in 2014 I was a bonehead. I need not say more. Since then, life wasn’t quite the same to me. I found myself mentioning that I missed this friendship every few weeks, and the response I got was to give it time.

At the beginning I was given the opportunity to rekindle this burnt bridge. It was an interesting experience for me, because I was so nervous that it made me all the more introverted. For someone who only speaks when prompted to, this means I said very little. When the time came to apologize, though, I was very thorough and inclusive of sore details for the sake of clearing the air. That day we had our first interaction since the fall out, and it had me smiling. We stopped by a wonderful botanical from which I got a few supplies for my white table, and catching up was a delight.

In the coming weeks, I returned a ring of hers that I kept during the fall out. She spent the night a few times at my apartment, and we’re back to regular texts and phone calls. My heart swells with joy because I got my best friend back, and after the shit storm that was 2016, this is the best gift life has given me since. I feel so happy all the time, and even though I’m afraid it’ll go away for one reason or another, I’m taking the time to nurture my confidence because I know it’s just my mind trying to remind me that I’ve had it unbelievably rough the past couple of years.

Every day now I give thanks for this second opportunity. I have those close to me that love me without limitations, I have a great group that I do business with and party with, and I have a family that although small is the joy of my existence. What a great personal reward, just under a year from the worst days of my life. I am truly lucky!



Feeling fortunate, please don't pinch me. I don't want to wake up!
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