Last night was the new moon in my sign, and I lit a rainbow candle to celebrate. I also had a very intense cleansing bath, and I cleaned up my spiritual work tools. It was a great night, and for me the start of my new year. A new beginning! I am so excited!
The past year has equated to total burnout. How is this possible? I worked so hard to get to where I was, but when life has its surprises in store, there’s really not much else that can be done about the discomfort. Sometimes we just have to comply, and that is exactly what I have been doing.
This past year I avoided a smothering depression by what feels like luck or divine intervention. I’ve had so many moments in which I felt myself about to snap, and sometimes I think I even snapped for a few seconds before I was able to feel the self control that reason sustains. It’s easy to lose yourself when emotions run so high that they blind you. Feeling something that stirs deeply in you can really alter your perception and how you carry out your life.
I’ve always considered myself to be a progressive person. It was really hard for me when I realized that I needed to lean on others for support because of the amount of stress I was dealing with. It’s not easy dealing with more than one trauma sustained in a short time period. People that I swore would always be there started to flake on me, and the pain that came from that became greater when I realized that people I thought were never going to be there for me stepped in to help. It was a really big eye opener in how much of myself I give, give, give constantly. I never expected anything back from those people I surrendered to, but their lack of support in the time I have most needed it in my life hurt me so much. I had to reassess everything about my life and the way I am living it.
So that brings us here. We’re kicking off a new Annual Review, and with it the hopes of finding solace. Cards have been there for me since the start of our relationship. When I don’t understand something, they help me see things from a new perspective. Today they shed some light for me on a new chapter in my life, and I am really looking forward to see what new beginnings feel like after such a strong upheaval in my life. I’m ready for Life 2.0!
★ October. The World.
It’s no joke when you feel like a whole new cycle is beginning. Before you can proceed, there is always a test. One last challenge to see whether or not you’re ready for the next stage of your life. Even when you fall out of the cycle and it feels like you are free-falling down an abyss, know that you’re not the first. Many others have braved this same path before you and have found themselves with familiar sentiments. It’s honestly all just protocol. You have to experience things in full, and that includes seeing cycles come to an end before new ones begin. Ask anyone around you; they’ve gone through the same thing in their own time!
★ November. Two of Swords.
I blanked when I drew this card. I’ve read it so many times before, but its message doesn’t make sense to me right away. I feel like being out of touch comes more as the inevitable, more so than something I am looking to do. Often times when we are on a different wave than that of others, we can feel misunderstood, or as if the message isn’t getting across quite right. This isn’t a month to make any big decisions or to confront anyone. Rather, it is a passive month. Sometimes silence is better for you.
★ December. Seven of Cups.
The year can wind down in a drunken stupor, trying to figure out how to fit dreams into plans of action. When you don’t feel confident about the unknown, you tip toe forward hesitantly, trying to go around obstacles rather than through and into them.
It’s true. I don’t feel very sure about what is coming, I feel destabilized. Some of my plans have changed, and so have my creative projects. I still need to spend some time with myself to think about goals for the future to bring clarity to my confusion.
★ January. Six of Swords.
This card tapped me into a sense of time. New beginnings can be very slow, however they can also be eye-opening. Even if the confidence isn’t there, we keep moving forward. That’s something we are required to do while we live on this Earth to survive. So move forward I will, into a new me and into a new year. Just at a more steady pace.
★ February. King of Cups.
The card rings strongly of a person, but who will it be? This mystery man is a leader with strong, unyielding character and a benevolent heart. An unshakeable personality and mind, often translating to a stubborn one. Who could it be? C? H? Somebody new coming into my life? We’ll just have to see.
In terms of the self, it may have something to do with settling down or moving into a new house, rather than staying in an apartment.
★ March. The Chariot.
Once more, things are in motion. A turning point in life can make you decide between your logic and your heart, all while you are also dealing with the madness of real life all around. Sometimes we don’t get the time that we need and we are forced to rush forward with the strength of somebody who has the assurance that we don’t. It can get confusing, but we trust that our choices are final when we make them and that is what makes us assertive as people.
★ April. Knight of Coins.
In where March is full of movement and adventure, here we have something very different instead. We are forced to slow down and take it steady, which is definitely not one of my strong points. I am used to being on the go and moving forward. Constantly changing, like a nomadic gypsy. Ever trusting the cosmos to sustain my decisions. This month, what is most guaranteed is the need to take things slow. Pause, think, then act eventually.
★ May. Three of Cups.
How do you juggle your social life, close connections and your personal adventures that no one else gets to hear about? Does anybody know how to keep things in balance and discrete, but still fun and lighthearted? In life it feels like we are constantly juggling people — lovers, clients, debt collectors, family, friends, the self. This is a good month to keep things in harmony and to enjoy life. Celebrate every chance you get!
★ June. The Fool.
Embrace new beginnings. The start of summer is a good time to have an adventure on your own. Say yes to new experiences that help you see life in a new way. Take the risk, buy that amazing Wheels and Dollbaby outfit you’ve been oggling at for days. You owe it to yourself to make your life feel like there is something new waiting around the corner, each time.
★ July. King of Wands.
Stripped of its personal qualities, this card can show an impulsive nature that thrives on the idea of irresponsible yet passionate adventures. Having fun just for the enjoyment, and not necessarily because it’s what you need to do.
★ August. Ace of Coins.
A new gift or opportunity can manifest. Often times the increments are of a small scale, but impact our lives in a way that can be meaningful. Life has something new to offer in this month, and it will be interesting to found out what it is. Whatever new venture comes, I am ready for it.
★ September. Ace of Wands.
Fancy that! Coincidental and yet so interesting. Another Ace, another beginning. This brings passion into play, whether be temperamental or romantic. It brings the fire of creativity and of self-assurance. I am ready to tackle whatever obstacle comes my way, and it with any new experience available.
★ Clarifier. Two of Wands.
This year is based around choosing. Choosing one option over the other, but only when the time calls for it. Don’t jump the gun, don’t rush into anything now that you’re free of troubles. Lay low and try to go your own way. If someone or something tries to slow you down, have a preemptive mindset that will help you prepare to act quickly if the need comes.
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