+ Visiting California
+ Muse concert
+ First time at a goth club, where I met Hugo and Roger
- My cousin passed away
+ Taking tribal/gothic bellydancing lessons
+ Mending broken connections with the Dark Priest
+ Got the Nusantara Tarot
+ Creatively a good month
+ Saw the rise of a new Hierophant
+ Romancing J
+ Exchanging letters with a stranger
+ J's birthday
+ Farewell celebrations
+ Met Gabe
- Mom fell ill and was rushed to the hospital
- Stressful month
- Went to the hospital every day
+ Had J around to take care of me
+ Mom left the hospital
+ Booked a new ticket to LA
+ Started a tarot dreams blog
+ Farewell celebrations commence
+ Correspondence with the Dark Priest
+ Hung out with my friend Gabe
+ Got back into gaming
+ Grandpa's 85th birthday celebration!
+ Met up with the Dark Priest
+ Farewell celebrations
+ Started a new life in Los Angeles
+ Met Kim and Hugo
+ Met Crystal
+ Met Bre, Adam & Ricky
+ Went clubbing often
+ Started a new internship
+ Saw Depeche Mode in concert!!
+ Moved to a new apartment
+ Halloween Fetish Ball… re-encountered Roger
+ Turned 25
+ Mom came to visit
+ Finally started feeling at home in California
+ Friendships started to bloom
+ Steampunk Ball… so much fun!
+ Sustainable Voyager Therapy… met James Wanless
+ Thanksgiving with Jaime's family
+ Bitchcraft Bazaar… saw Marcella Kroll!
+ Winter Fetish Ball & Bar Sinister
+ Visiting Puerto Rico
+ Christmas dinner party
- Started to thin down my tarot collection
FAVORITE PHOTOS OF 2013:
(01) DESCRIBE 2013 IN THREE WORDS:
Severe. Life-changing. Passionate.
(02) WHICH CONCERTS DID YOU VISIT IN 2013?
Depeche Mode // Crystal Castles, Grendel, Muse,
(03) WHAT WERE YOUR THREE FAVORITE MOMENTS IN 2013?
01 The day I got news Mom would be okay.
02 This one is lengthy. Celebrations up to moving from Puerto Rico to California were great. Specifically that last day when I caught up with an old friend before coming home to my family to celebrate.
03 Seeing Depeche Mode live. What an experience! I will never forget it.
(04) WHICH ONE WAS YOUR FAVORITE MONTH?
That's a tough choice, but it is for sure one of the later months of 2013. I'll go with October. That was really a very fun month. It brought with it new acquaintances as well as familiar faces that came back into my life. Love!
(05) WHO WERE THE MOST INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE OF 2013?
Mom: The first half of this year revolved solely around her well-being. I found out how important it is to remind the people that you care about that you love them. It doesn't need to be every day and it doesn't need to be talked about; something as simple as a cuddle or a gesture would do.
Jean: Oh, J… Where would I be if not for you? Words don't do this man justice. He is loving and compassionate, and he is an exemplary person in so many ways. He has taught me the warmth of tolerance and compassion, as well as the sting of sharp words exchanged in impulse. The love he showers me with is unparalleled. I know this sounds really lame, but it is the kind of love they write stories about. You will always be number one.
Arish Lam: This is my dance teacher, who taught me how to come out of my shell. He loves free expression through dance, and really injected a zest for life that I possibly would not have found otherwise. Whenever I went up for a heart to heart with him, I felt electric excitement. I felt that I was talking to a person whose senses and consciousness were in balance, and that was quite refreshing.
Jaime: A college favorite made a strong comeback! We haven't met since we graduated from college in May 7th, 2010. He taught me how important it is to simplify, and when not to give attention to situations that don't merit it. He has such a wonderful heart of gold. Awesome room mate!
Cristy: Came unexpectedly and late during the year, but wow — I love her! She is like the sister that I never had while I was growing up, and I am very happy that we get to have heart to hearts and conversations together. Super lover!
Hugo & Kim: What a sweet, sweet soul. I met you at the least likely place you'd make a friend, but so we clicked. Hugo is a sweetheart, we met at the club and it felt like an instant 'click.' I found out that you don't need to know somebody through and through to care about them, but I do feel that it makes getting to know someone more meaningful. I am really looking forward to peeling back the layers and taking the time to get properly acquainted.
Kim is a sweetheart. I feel lots of endearment when it comes to her, and look forward to get to know her more in the coming year. I resonate deeply with her.
Roger: Hmmm… Where to start? When I first met this person, I brushed him off. I didn't think there was anything in him that could prove to be worthwhile because of the mindset we were in when we met. [I mean come on, we met at a club!] I was wrong. We clicked, and in this person I found a very curious mind and enough material to kill hours in conversation. We are still getting acquainted, but I like him so very much!
Dark Priest: Oh, you… It seems I try to run away, but life always pulls us closer together. It's sheer magnetism, and try as we might, I don't think either one of us can truly get away. This person has always been a major inspiration. He brings out a side of me that many are not acquainted with, and probably won't be. We have had riveting conversations and experiences that make me wonder why we resist the tugs-and-pulls of life. To tell you the truth, we talk to one another less than we actually think about the experience of knowing each other. It is very much a platonic relationship, in which we found in one another high resonance, but have not been able to manifest in it completely. I'm happy to have him in my life.
(06) HAVE YOU MADE PLANS FOR TRAVELING IN 2014?
Ideally, I will be able to visit Florida, Prague or Japan sometime in 2014. I have no plans to travel anywhere other than Puerto Rico, though.
(07) BEST BOOK YOU READ IN 2013?
Playing Card Oracles
(08) 5 MUSICIANS YOU LISTENED TO WAY TOO MUCH IN 2013:
(09) WHAT DO YOU LOOK FORWARD TO IN 2014?
I am going to see Kyary Pamyu-Pamyu live as well as Suicide Commando and Combichrist. If lucky,I may also catch VNV Nation and Abney Park live.
In retrospect, the year of the Hanged Man was very tough. Adding up 12, you get 3 for Empress. My mother’s health problems were the cause for much concern and hesitation. I knew that there was a reason why my life was keeping me enslaved in Puerto Rico, but had not imagined it would be this serious. I must reaffirm that everything happens for a reason. Things don’t happen without consequence, and we must be willing to accept that fact if we want to move on.
I learned to feel friendship rather than hope for it. After years of dreaming with healthy interpersonal relationships and hoping to connect with others, I found that it happens when you are truly open with your heart. Try not to pay so much attention to the friendships that don’t work out. I learned this year that life will naturally weed people out of your life that don’t need to be there. Even if you care for them dearly, let them go if you feel life is taking them away from you. Further down the line, you will be able to see why they had to go.
I might not have a favorite month or moment, but I know that I am very thankful for all the tough lessons that I learned in 2013. I won't forget all of the lessons that I learned through trial, error and tears.
Happy new 2014!!!
Whoa! What a loving week. It seems to be centered around emotions, and reactions that we have to our environment when we are in a more sensible mindset. I get the sense of having an open heart, and openness in general when it comes to feeling influences around you. The energy suggests embracing someone even after they have made a mistake, and being compassionate before those less tolerant. There is the feeling of a loving shield to bounce back the negativity, which can be quite useful if you remain open to radiate love and compassion.
How have you been doing lately? I have been swimming in the sea of happiness. It certainly does feel as if 2013 is drawing to a close, and in the spirit of winding down the year, I am starting to feel the coming of a new year. The feeling of shedding old skin is certainly relevant here and should be taken advantage of. Go ahead, shake off all of that stuff that you feel you would be doing better without, and prepare yourself to accept new things in your life. I am trying my hand at cleansing and attracting manifestations, and thus far find it useful.
Yesterday I sat before my friend Marcella Kroll as she read the game of fate for me. With each card that she turned over, she delivered messages that struck deep personal cords. I resonated with everything she told me, as the reading was grounded in the present and made so much sense. She told me that this next New Moon in the new year will be very important. It is relevant to a person spending their first new year in a new city they have just moved to. There is change manifesting everywhere, and this is a great time to ride that wave of change. Be ready to embrace a new you, whether you took the brave step of moving someplace entirely new or not.
The Victorian Romantic Tarot 2nd Edition comes with two Lovers cards. Some people choose just one to use in readings, based off which card they resonate with the most. It could just be that one card depicts the idea of what the Lovers card means for that person more accurately. Seeing both Lovers cards coming up side by side was a pretty big surprise, and can be interpreted as different sides to love. It can also be a separate dynamic dealing with personal perceptions.
This week we also have the presence of two monarchs of the court.
♡ Monday. Queen of Swords. Drawing wisdom from hard experience. Harshness towards fools or anyone trying to take the advantage. Defensiveness and good judgment, even under pressure.
I feel from her a disconnect from her surroundings. She’s there, but her mind is elsewhere. She has an invisible wall up that people won’t dare cross; it is an air of intimidation present.
♡ Tuesday. Emperor. Rigid structure. Sometimes you need to conform your parameters to please somebody else. When there are responsibilities present, I turns into we, and a conscious effort will have to be made to do what is best for the team and not just for yourself. Be a team player and assume responsibility where it is needed, that will be the basis of your success.
♡ Wednesday. Ace of Wands. Passion, swiftness and complete surrender. This signifies a moment full of action; it can be to take a dive or a big risk into something that you are not sure is the best option for you.
♡ Thursday. Ten of Cups. Rejoice! There is so much happiness present with the arrival of a new family member in this card. Celebrate life, celebrate everything you have and the wonderful people that you are spending your life with. They will make a difference; once you feel the change, you just need to go with it.
♡ Friday. Queen of Wands. Passion. She embodies all that is wild and frivolous. I think this is my favorite of the Victorian Romantic Tarot court cards. Her pose is regal, and she looks at you like she means business. I love her spark; she seems quite charming to me. A lot of fire, for sure!
♡ Saturday. The Lovers. This card is one of pure devotion and surrender to another person. The motion suggested in this card is quite beautiful, because it shows how the embrace begins from the moment that the bodies attract. She lands in his arms, and for a moment you get the anticipation of what it will feel like when she does. Magic! What a card of sweet, sweet surrender into the arms of somebody special.
♡ Sunday. The Lovers. This card depicts a more controlled romance; this kind of romance is idealistic and minded for public exposure. It is the guise assumed when you step out in public. Eyes will be on you and you must be mindful of your actions, because others will be watching you. It isn't as romantic as the one from the card previous; rather, it is a very different kind of love. It does not seem loving or affectionate in any form other than that of respect.
♡ What to avoid. Knight of Swords. Quit rushing into things. Make time instead to think things through. Actions will have consequences, no mater how much you may try to disregard them. There will be responsibility for your words as well as what you do, and you have to be careful not to sacrifice something that you love in the process.
♡ What to strive for. Two of Coins. Juggle the circumstances until you have a comfortable grip on it. it takes practice to get something right, but if you practice for long enough, you just might have all that you need.
Looks good. I hope you are ready to tackle this week with me!
Last week was so much fun. I can't even begin to tell you how much I have enjoyed myself. The weekend was a big manifestation of love and freedom, which I feel ecstatic to absorb. It feels like the circumstances are falling into place and I am going to be able to feel my way through. It's pretty liberating to be given the chance to enjoy the blessings of acceptance.
This week seems like a real challenge. In the spread itself, the cartomantic number 5 is one of instability and much conflict. It disrupts the balance of cards that are otherwise perfectly symmetrical, and in turn affects much in the same way.
I have never before had such a negative reading in my blog, but it is the week of my Mother's operation and I am very nervous about how it's going to go. I hope that everything goes well and stabilizes soon; from the look of it, it won't be easy at all.
♡ Monday. Knight of Coins. Seems like a slow but productive start to the week. With a steady gallop, you can continue on your way. Be in good cheer and stay balanced.
♡ Tuesday. Six of Cups. Thinking back on the past. Getting lost in memory can be a really sweet thing, especially when you share those memories with someone that resonates with them as well.
♡ Wednesday. Three of Swords. Ouch! News that hit with heartbreak and can cloud our day. It can be something totally unexpected happening that hurts our feelings, but we should still be open to things turning positive.
♡ Thursday. Six of Coins. Working diligently to ensure that things run more smoothly. Sometimes it's okay to ask for help when you need it.
♡ Friday. Five of Cups. What a spill of emotions! This looks really sad. Sometimes we focus on what we are missing and forget about what is still left. Try not to let your emotions get the best of you.
♡ Saturday. Five of Wands. There is so much trouble present; fight after fight, problem after problem. The most important thing is to be aware that there are conflicting circumstances, and that there is always a solution, no matter how dark it looks.
♡ Sunday. The Emperor. Settling down into a routine and looking towards the future. Get organized for the week, outline your plans and follow them through. It takes a lot of discipline to see things through in the manner that you do, but remember that we are not given a heavier burden than we can carry.
♡ What to avoid. King of Wands. Avoid wrath and negativity that stems from pride. You don't always need to be right, you don't have to be the one in control. Learn to be flexible and you will be able to move forward with your plans.
♡ What to strive for. The Hermit. Strive to keep your matters private. Pull back now and then to assess where things are going. Look for a sense of direction and also be open to new ideas making their way into your mind. Be open to creativity, seek a sense of direction and listen to your inner guiding star.
Whether your week turns out easygoing or difficult, make the best of it.
These past few days have been very enlightening. I feel renewed; I feel like a whole different person.
On Wednesday night, the night that marks my 3rd anniversary with J, I found myself en route to Mystic Journey bookstore in Venice, California. It was a very special night in the sense that James Wanless PH.D. was hosting his monthly Voyager Tarot group therapy. This brilliant visionary is the author of the deck responsible for my career. Years before the Vertigo Tarot came into my possession, I was learning to read the tarot with the Voyager deck.
Meeting James Wanless PH.D. in person was quite a surreal experience. I couldn’t believe it when I sat down.
The group was very inviting. Each and every person in attendance is genuine and beautiful. They all had a strong sense of character and personality that I was very drawn to. As the night progressed, we shared deep testimonials about our lives. We participated in what turned out to be a group reading which applied to every one of us. This is my first time joining a discussion around people who are very knowledgeable about the tarot and it was a wonderful experience. They talked freely, openly and what I assume to be without judgment. I found James to be very charismatic as well as business savvy. The first card that was drawn was that of the Chariot. 2014’s numbers add up to 7, and so we used that as a guide for the rest of the reading. At the very end, we all got to draw a card to keep from James’ deck of cards. Of course I’d turn over a card and get the Moon… that’s a given! My signifier made me burst in laughter.
When I walked out of Mystic Journey bookstore, I was a brand new person. I felt as if I had undergone a spiritual baptism, my soul felt renewed. When I got into my room mate’s car, it felt as if my emotions were overwhelmingly compassionate. My heart was flooded with love and light; at that moment I just wanted to hug the entire state of California. I felt really grounded and full of love, which is not out of character, but is not exactly the way that I am.
One day spilled into another, and it was Thanksgiving morning. I missed the parade and all the traditions that my family upholds year after year. I missed the company of my Mom, which is my soulmate. I missed J, my rock. He’s my everything; he is all that is good in my life. It was a whole new experience.
We went to my room mate’s cousin’s event. I met many, many new faces and shared a new tradition. The conversation flowed over a relaxed glass of wine. The whole experience was very new and full of tell-tales. For example, I learned that in Iowa they deep fry butter. I kid you not! They are very hardcore.
By the end of the night, I could not contain my smile. I find myself laughing alone, but feeling anything but. I don’t feel alone… I feel that I am very, very much loved. I feel accompanied by the spirit of all the people that have grown close to me over the years, no matter how distant. Hell, I feel like a love letter to the universe. Y’know?
Why would circumstances be enough to get us down? I don’t know… life is really magical if you let it be. For all those who feel they resonate with this entry: let’s make a promise. Let’s vow never, ever ever to let real life get in the way of our happiness. Release all that keeps you bound down. Release pain, resentment and fear. Throw it to the wind! You don’t need it. Nobody does.
From here on forth, I promise never to chain myself to an oppressive circumstance. I promise never, ever ever to limit myself. I promise to cultivate as much love and compassion as is possible, even when my heart chakra doesn’t resonate at a frequency as high as the one I am now.
Cheers to a whole new year filled with love and joy.
What a wonderful feeling, to be completely refreshed as the weekend winds down. As we bid adieu to another brief chapter of the year, another one commences. Weeks are containers for events, measuring time in a continuum that varies in number and situation. I am not making much sense, I know, but that’s just me trying to make sense of a nonsensical connection.
The theme of this week has a lot to do with affirmative action. It’s very proactive in the sense that it seems to be pushing for motion rather than sitting to wait for things to happen. Something to think about. And how about those two Aces and Kings?
♡ Monday. Ace of Wands. The week starts off with sparks. Strive to be your very best; stay motivated and let your creativity do the talking for you. If it is a matter of your craft, devote time to perfecting it until you are more than satisfied with the outcome. If it is passion you seek, it is passion you will get.
♡ Tuesday. High Priestess. See, she stands between the pillars that represent all that is light and all that is dark. She presses her veil to her face so as to not allow passersby to see her because she prefers to work in secret. There is mystery to her that will make people wonder what she is doing. The most important thing to remember is that she is true to herself, and she never forgets her purpose or where she is going. She knows how to be discrete as she proceeds with her life. A wonderful lesson to come by.
♡ Wednesday. Ace of Coins. This card is anything but traditional. What really catches my attention is the light in this card. I feel as if it were the moon shining directly behind the top of the tower from the perspective it is being looked out at. Seek out a symbol that will guide you, or seek to finish something that you started but have not yet finished.
♡ Thursday. Page of Wands. Echoing the start of the week, this card denotes a spark of passion for what it is you do. If you surrender to routine because it is easy, routine is exactly what you’re going to get. Pay attention to the little details and remain curious to add some spice to your day.
♡ Friday. King of Cups. Sweet love comes in the most unexpected form sometimes. Sometimes, it comes in the form of an unhealthy obsession from a distance. If we see only what we want to see, we are actually separating from reality and engaging in an active day dream. It’s very important not to let the way we feel blind us from seeing what is actually there.
♡ Saturday. King of Coins. Just look at all that wealth hidden in a tome under what seems to be the head of a monarch. I don’t know about you, but as curious as I am to know what is inside, I would not remove the head of the monarch. It seems disrespectful to disturb his slumber. This card feels like a signifier.
♡ Sunday. Nine of Coins. Find your comfort zone again and relish it. There is a reason why we need our own personal space to be in order. If it isn’t, soon our thoughts are to follow. Strive to give order to disarray by keeping your surroundings neat.
♡ What to avoid. Judgment. Try not to force new beginnings to happen unnaturally. Just let time do it’s thing and you will find that what you have been waiting for all along will some to you instead. Allow yourself to be surprised by what life offers. We can’t play God all the time.
♡ What to strive for. Six of Wands. Look to keep progressing. Move forward, in affirmative action. Be sure with every step that you take that you are heading in the right direction. Don’t make time to step back, just keep on going. Soon there will be no notion telling you to backpedal. Rather, you will have found your day.
Wishing you a lovely week!
Whoa! Okay, sometimes it’s hard to coordinate with the blog when unprecedented events take place. The past weekend was very interesting, but I prefer talking to you about tarot cards.
A couple of weeks back we had an eventful week without the guidance of the tarot. After having the resource available to look at a day before or during the events, it helps to have a card for the day. Lacking the resources actually made me realize how necessary it is to keep the tradition going. It really is like a northern star lighting the way for some of us that use it. After not having it for nearly two weeks, I decided to try and give it another shot.
This week we have an abundance of Swords, Major Arcana and Wands. The suits are completely disproportionate in terms of the balance. There is one Coins card and nothing to do with Cups. It appears that as we delve deeper and deeper into the mind, there is a disconnect to the heart. I have been feeling that way lately, to tell you the truth. My thoughts race and I spend hours thinking about the same things. While it’s great to get perspective, it’s also very limiting when it’s all you think about.
♡ Monday. Five of Swords. It’s easy to slip when your mind is very busy… and my mind has certainly been very busy. I find that if we focus on one detail, we’re really missing the whole picture. The consequences are illustrated in the card.
♡ Tuesday. The High Priestess. Lately, detachment to surroundings leads to hardcore introspection. I have been thinking the days away in hope to find an answer. What I have found, once more resonating with the card that came before, is that when we focus on just one area, all the surrounding aspects of the self get stuck too. Everything is held up until we are ready to get back in motion again.
♡ Wednesday. Six of Swords. Being misled, going out of your way or taking a detour. It never occurred to me that the characters in this card could be lost. For some reason, I always assumed the driver knew where he was going. Relating it back to the card, the conversation was so immersive that they both lost their way in the process. Interesting.
♡ Thursday. Two of Coins. Juggling circumstances and projects to stay afloat. That’s true, today is the day I am catching up and making up for the past few days.
♡ Friday. Queen of Wands. See, she sits on her throne. She is pampered to the point of being spoiled. She inspires others and is inspired in turn, radiating good energy and a bit of sass.
♡ Saturday. The Fool. Venturing into dark waters without an anchor. This good-natured card seems rather irresponsible in the hopes of finding a new adventure to delight in.
♡ Sunday. Two of Wands. It’s tough to make a choice sometimes. The day feels terribly uneventful, or perhaps is a blessing to be slow. Sometimes it’s nice to catch a break; that’s exactly what Sunday should be.
♡ What to avoid. Ten of Swords. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop being negative and stop getting yourself in trouble. Accept the end of things that are no longer progressing and give yourself the chance to start over when the time is right.
♡ What to strive for. The Hanged Man. Just wait until things make sense or fall into place. Allow the things you have learned along the way to shed light on where you want to go next, but don’t let it consume you. You will find your way at the right time.
Sometimes it feels like life is telling you, "hey... just take a break." Ever since Hello Witches started a little over a year ago, I have not skipped more than a week. I felt really burnt out with all the changes that were going on, and whenever I sat down to write, the words weren't flowing as I thought that they should. I have 4 posts queued already for when the right time comes up, but to be honest they don't feel relevant anymore given the change of circumstance. I discovered that a post must be published at the right time, and while the context is still relevant. When you undergo a personal transformation, the things that used to hover around you in your environment also change.
Dangers are lurking ahead this week with the Ten of Swords and Three of Swords present. Whether or not it is a situation regarding intellect, it's clear that you need to exercise caution this week.
♡ Monday. Ten of Swords. The week could be off to a better start. Let's not sugarcoat it; this is a tough start. Sometimes, something happens at the start of the day that makes you feel like you got off on the wrong foot. Even when you try to escape that notion, you may come to find that the rest of the day falls under that same note. Endure!
♡ Tuesday. Ace of Coins. This is good, this is the seed of opportunity being planted. Watch out for the sign of a gift or the sign of something happening in your area. It could be a pretty interesting event.
♡ Wednesday. Justice. The balance is restored when you handle a situation that is difficult in a civil way. Find the way to reconcile what doesn't work with the way it must be.
♡ Thursday. The Fool. Take a leap of faith, but look before you leap so you don't land on the rocks. Eagerness can be the main cause of a mistake, mostly because we don't see the harm it can cause.
♡ Friday. Three of Swords. An irresponsible risk can take you far; don't expose yourself to a negative situation. I look at this card and think or feel that it's a really good day to stay indoors. It's better to avoid problems. Watch your words with people; someone may be having a particularly bad day, and react negatively to something you say.
♡ Saturday. The World. The portals open, opportunities are offered. Shed your old skin, release the negative energy in the air and look forward to starting the next level.
♡ Sunday. Six of Cups. A melancholic moment; sometimes our mind brings us back to a place where memories run rampant. We can dream and look back at the same time, often employing elements of both situations in the approach.
♡ What to avoid. Six of Coins. If asking for help is not an option, try to bend your will and at least reach out to someone to let them know that you're having a hard time with something. When a tough situation comes up, you should not endure it by yourself.
♡ What to strive for. Nine of Swords. Don't stress. Try not to let yourself get carried away with something that is causing you anxiety. Accept it, wallow in it for a little while if you must, but don't let it take over completely. You can't afford to jump two steps back after the progress you have made.
It feels good to be back. This blog is really important to me. Wishing you some smooth sailing!